PATTAYA, Mar.99 Hi LP Team, just returned from a weekend trip to Pattaya. Pattaya is a Thai city with lots of German writing and lots of German falang. (I am German, too.) A major part of these falang seem to be BILD-Zeitung readers, are not so young and not so slim either. They often suffer from insufficient hair growth and are usually accompanied by a local female. Well, not all of Pattaya is German. I have seen more than a few British, Irish, Italian, Arabian / Indian, Skandinavian, French spots. Surprise, surprise, there's also Cyrillic writing. Russians seem to feed well on German food. The French and German food I have tried is as good as home though prices are not far from home, eiter. You cannot get Newcastle Brown Ale in Pattaya. Shopping is not so bad though you may pay a bit more than in Bangkok: Customers accept higher prices. However, Pattaya may be the only place where you find the very latest fashion stuff. Other places are ususally a bit behind. If you know what you pay at home, it is still cheaper here. There are lots of tailors around. Usually they advertise in English, German and French and all claim to be very good. But haven't tried any. I prefer to buy my stuff in the big department stores. Be careful when hitting the road with a motorbike or car in Pattaya. You'll find too many German drivers in this place and they practice a driving style that is not what you may expect after you've been in other areas of Thailand. Accommodation: There are soooo many places. Really cheap ones around B120 are few, these are usually the hourly hotels used by Thai. Around B300 there are a lot. And more upmarket, too. Several places offer monthly rates (condominiums or "condotels"). The huge hi-rise hotel things are world class, and a world of their own. I bet these are best booked from Europe together with a flight. I went to Southern Pattaya and attempted camping on a sandy spot behind the Marina. But folks living near there didn't like it and they eventually said I could not pitch my tent there as they are afraid that something would happen to me (and they would be held responsible). I have my doubts about the water in Pattaya (and Jomtien Beach, too): After you get out of the sea, you are stinking. And after you shower in the hotel (t'was a cheap one), it ain't better. Tip for budget travellers: Want to save the B10 that many places near the beach charge for a shower / bath ? Go to a gas station. They have a tap and a hose for people to wash their motorcycles (or mountainbikes). It's most enertaining for the staff of such a service station when a falang goes there for a shower. But it is free, almost anywhere in Thailand. Though in Pattaya, you'd still be stinking. On top of the hill between Jomtien and Pattaya, there is a radio station and a temple with a restaurant. Nice view. Pattaya is a sex-paradise. I've never seen such a thing before. Can't describe it. One thing you may not find there are falang girls. Watersports: In Jomtien Beach, Jetskis go for B800 / hour, B400..500 per half hour. If it is more, you are probably talking to someone who is renting out the jetskis for someone else (who is still not the one owning the jetskis, as one costs as much as a small car). If you have the money, take the jetskis. As a swimmer you run the risk of being run over by an unexperienced rider. Better for you if you are the unexperienced rider who runs over a swimmer. Just avoid conflicts with hard objects, there is a lot of maritime traffic (yes, I am an unexperienced rider). Bicycles come very handy in Pattaya. They get you easily anywhere you may want to go and you can even ride the walkway along the beach. Cheap cycles are rented out in some places. More popular are 4WDs and motorbikes (virtually any size available for rent). Tourist Police is cruising on pretty cool yellow mountain bikes. If you are serious about mountainbiking: 15.8 km (direct line) from Pattaya Beach is a tempel called "Wat Tham Partu:n". The exact location is [N12^57.696` E101^01.206]. Coming from Bangkok, outer ring road, go on the Chonburi Motorway to Pattaya. Where it splits Pattaya/Rayong, go to Rayong. After a few km you'll see a race track (Bira Circuit) on the right. There you turn back and go the first road right (sorry, it's the best way to describe it). 3.5 km from the turn, follow a small asphalt road up left into the forest. Pass a gate, and you are inside the temple compound. If you don't pass the gate but turn right and follow the track along the fence, you'll soon see arrows and marks. I consider it a very nice mountainbike track as it is a bit of everything. It is not for roadbikes. From one point of the track, you can see Pattaya and the sea. On Saturday / Sunday mornings, you'll most likely meet other bikers. No food is sold in the temple or along the track. Please keep it clean. So that's Pattaya. Regards, Martin